The Tao means “The Way” or in the middle. It is the place where there is no energy pushing in either direction. I think of a pendulum, the kind that you find sitting on a desk in the doctor’s office… as you send one end against the other it swings back and forth, only coming to rest in the middle when there is no force on either end. How long can a pendulum stay at one of its outermost positions? Only for a second and this is because neither extreme can last. How long can a pendulum stay at rest? It can remain there forever, because there are no forces moving it out of balance.

The Importance Of The Tao

To understand the Tao, you must look closer at what lies between the two extremes. We waste tremendous energy at the extremes. The inefficiency of our actions is determined by how many degrees off center we are. We are less able to use our energy for living life because we are using it to adjust the pendulum swings. What does this look like in life? Have you ever wanted to lose weight? So you cut out all that “bad” food – no carbs, so sugar, no coffee, no alcohol, no processed food… you keep putting the “no’s” on until there are so many restrictions you are starving and frustrated and the next thing you know – you are grabbing cookies, candy, chips and french fries (that was the pendulum swing). Maybe you want to get into shape, so you start an exercise program. You go to the gym every day – do a group fitness class, run, do yoga, hit the weights, spin, the elliptical.. so much so that you are exhausted and you can’t do anything the next day or maybe you even injure yourself and cannot exercise at all for weeks. Perhaps you want to be more social – so you fill you calendar up with activities, events, lunches, dinners, coffee dates – throwing that pendulum all the way into social overload…. and then you go into isolation, needing to decompress and don’t go out at all. When we are off-center, it zaps our energy.

Finding Harmony From Extremes

Don’t worry, extremes are good teachers. When you examine the extremes, it’s easy to see the effects of imbalanced behavior patterns. The key is to find the balance in the center and the result is a life in harmony.

How do you go to extremes?

If you’re struggling to find harmony, contact us to see how counseling, including therapy for women, can help.